The Social injustice that we witness every day in our lives is something that parents feel extremely uncomfortable discussing. Certain news headlines are not discussed or certain books you are not allowed to read. Especially when it concerns caste-based discrimination, our society collectively ignores them. They even sometimes come up with statements like “ Who do you think sees caste now?”. But it has always been noticeable. It is years of oppression that people from privileged sections of the society have used as a weapon to oppress individuals belonging to the marginalized sections of the society.  

There was a news article that visibly disturbed me. It had the following headline: “Man, pregnant wife hacked to death over inter-caste marriage”.  It shocked me that brutal murder can be done just because society was against love. They could simply not bear two adults taking the decision to go against the barriers of society and live the way that they wanted to. After years of conversations around the evils of caste and inter-caste marriages being acknowledged and provided a lot of provisions by the government, the society refuses to recognize the discrimination that exists.  

Another book that deeply impacted me was The Pyre by Perumal Murugan. It is about an inter-caste couple getting married and going to the man's hometown. The man and the woman hide the fact to his family members that the woman he has married belongs to another caste to prevent the anger and atrocities against them. The constant fear that the woman lives in, knowing that once they find her real identity, they may harm her in any way, shakes us to the core. I would not like to mention the ending as some who are reading this article may want to go and read the book for themselves. 

It indeed made me start to question all the forms of caste-based discrimination. But such horrific incidents, though very saddening, felt distant to me, and I felt I was protected from it. I also thought with confidence that my generation would not face problems from our parents when we fell in love with individuals from another caste.  

But I have never been more wrong. My family was casteist and have uttered statements that consistently discriminated among the various castes that existed. There was always a sense of superiority. They made it a point to mock the marginalized section of society. But I felt that love would conquer it all. I deeply related to the feeling deep inside me that our family will prioritize love over the various forms of caste-based discrimination they practiced. My cousin fell in love with a man from the oppressed section of society. After years of conversations on how it can be conveyed to our family, she finally confided in her parents. The instances that happened after that still remain fresh in my memory as a deep scar. She was shouted at in the worst possible way, shamed for choosing to go against her parents. The boy’s caste was mocked most possibly. She was emotionally manipulated in the worst possible ways to let go of the relationship. She stood firm against all the opposition and wanted to marry the man of her choice. The parents did not stop at hurting my cousin. They disrespected the man’s parents because they came from an oppressed section of society. She decided to marry against her parents' will. She still faces discrimination from society and parents that should have loved her and completely accepted her. The man and his parents still carry the burden and pain of the insults heaped on them based on their birth and identity. But they decided to brave all the forms of injustice, emerging victorious and living life to the fullest. They even help other couples in an inter-caste relationship with assurance and acceptance. But no one deserves to go through this pain, and it is unacceptable. I stood with her through the entire marriage process and moving out of her toxic family. 

These incidents provide a lot of clarity on how caste is viewed in our society. Caste-based discrimination is an evil that is accepted as a birthright by people belonging to the oppressed sections of society. There have been comments from various acquaintances that say caste discrimination cannot be equated to violence. This is a cruel way of looking at such a dangerous situation. All forms of discrimination over a point lead to violence or serve as a starting point to the spiral of violence. Imagine from childhood, an individual is oppressed simply based on their caste. It snatches them of opportunities; it robs them of their rightful way of living. Any form of discrimination is violence and let’s never allow anyone to dilute how horrid caste-based discrimination is.  

Caste-based discrimination in relationships has long destroyed the unity of a society. It should be viewed as a human rights violation that should be looked upon as a problem we will have to collectively solve as a society. The act of killing individuals in relationships or marrying outside their caste is referred to as honour killing. There is no honor in these forms of murder which have to be given the worst of punishments. The court in 2006 remarked that caste-based killings are nothing but barbaric and shameful acts.  

 There are a lot of organizations that help inter-caste couples with protection and awareness on laws that can help them fight against discrimination and violence. An app called “Kadhal Aran” helps couples at risk of honour killings. An organization called “Love Commandos” runs more than 500 shelters in India to protect intercaste couples from violence. You can always support inter-caste couples by providing them support or referring them to organizations that can help them. The police and the judiciary can also be approached to get justice and protection from the heinous practices of caste-based discrimination. 

In a society where most of the marriages are finalized on the basis of the bride and groom’s caste, the act of an inter-caste relationship and fighting against the society’s outdated practices is a radical act. Inter-caste relationships have to be appreciated, respected, and accepted! 

Let’s love each other, setting aside differences, bring about a better society. The words of Dr.BR Ambedkar are a beautiful source of inspiration for all of us to fight caste discrimination. The quote is“ Educate, Agitate, Organise”. We should educate ourselves against caste-based violence, agitate against such discrimination, organize ourselves and form a collective identity to bring about a change in our society through revolution and awareness. 

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