Blog / Breaking family stigma around mental health starts with you
Breaking family stigma around mental health starts with you
15.07.2024 | Kavya Ashok
Healing starts with courage. And courage is independent of others, even your closest family. Courage comes from within.
Riya sat quietly in her small room, the noise of her bustling family household muffled by the closed door. She stared at her phone, her finger hovering over the contact button for a mental health helpline. A knot tightened in her stomach. She had been raised in a traditional family where mental health disorders like depression and anxiety were either dismissed or seen as signs of weakness. The concept of seeking help for mental health was alien, even shameful.
But Riya could go no longer without help.
But her struggles started very early on.
Riya's journey with mental health began in her early teens. She had always been a high achiever, the pride of her family. Her parents often boasted about her academic successes to their friends and relatives. But the pressure to maintain this image of perfection became overwhelming. The expectations grew heavier each year, and with them, so did Riya's anxiety. By the time she reached college, she was battling sleepless nights, panic attacks, and an unshakable feeling of worthlessness.
In her community, mental health issues were often swept under the rug. If someone expressed feelings of depression, they were told to pray more or to simply "think positive." Seeking professional help was out of the question. It was a taboo subject, associated with disgrace and dishonour to the family.
An extremely trapping feeling to balance the weight of family expectations, their understanding of shame and mental health and her struggles.
She wanted to talk about her struggles, but the fear of bringing shame upon her family kept her silent.
The turning point came when Riya's best friend, Ankita, noticed the drastic change in her behaviour. Ankita knew something was wrong and gently confronted Riya. With tears streaming down her face, Riya confided in Ankita about her struggles. Priya listened patiently.
She went on to share something that took Riya by surprise: Ankita had also faced similar issues and had sought help from a therapist and it had made a WORLD of difference for her.
Ankita’s openness gave Riya hope.
If her friend could seek help and still be respected, maybe she could too. With Ankita’s encouragement, Riya decided to take the first step. She found a discreet mental health helpline that offered confidential support. Speaking to a therapist for the first time was like releasing a valve—Riya poured out her heart, and her therapist listened without judgment, creating an extremely safe space for her.
Over several sessions, they discussed ways to manage her anxiety and strategies to cope with the immense pressure she felt.
Riya's initial relief soon gave way to fear again. How would her family react if they found out? The fear of bringing shame and dishonour to her family was still stuck at the back of her mind. Especially because it was her, Riya the overachiever.
But now we know that seeking help was a sign of strength, not weakness. Over time, Riya began to see this truth for herself. She attended therapy sessions regularly and started to feel more in control of her life.
One day, during a family dinner, Riya mustered the courage to talk about mental health. She shared her experience in a way that her family could understand, emphasising how common and manageable mental health issues are with the right support. To her surprise, her parents listened. Once the initial shock wore off, it slowly gave way to openness, especially when they saw the positive changes in Riya.
Riya's story is one of many in India where the stigma around mental health remains a significant barrier. But the tides are changing, or we hope.
More people are beginning to speak out, share their experiences, and seek the help they need. Organisations and helplines are working tirelessly to provide support and education, aiming to break the stigma and promote mental well-being.
If you or someone you know is struggling, remember that seeking help is not a sign of weakness. It's a courageous step towards healing. iDare offers affordable mental health support through qualified therapists to anyone who needs it.
You are not alone, and help is available. It’s your journey, and your journey to a happier, healthier and more fulfilling life. And it’s yours alone.
If you or someone you know is facing a tough time, remember, you’re not alone. iDare offers affordable mental health support. Reach out and take the first step towards a healthier, happier you.
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