Sailing Through Grief: Finding Calm After the Storm
Loss of a loved one. The ending of a relationship.
Memories. Despair. The crushing weight of sadness.
When sorrow grips you, the simplest things—getting through the day, finding meaning, breathing—can feel impossibly heavy.
Is there a way out? Maybe not a quick escape, but there is a way through.
In this piece, I hope to share gentle insights that can serve as lighthouses guiding you toward the shore, as you set sail on what feels like a stormy sea of sorrow.
Setting Sail: The First Days of Grief
You may feel as though you’ve lost touch with reality. Numbness pervades your being, but your heart and eyes still speak—through tears, aching for something or someone no longer there.
Most of us, at the beginning of grief, speak of shock and denial. This early stage is the most disorienting—time feels warped, and the world no longer makes sense.
Here’s how to care for yourself during this phase:
-
Offer yourself the tender care you would give a loved one in crisis.
-
Don’t set goals or deadlines. Let life wait while you pause and heal.
-
Surround yourself with trusted people—those who can sit with your silence without needing to fill it.
-
Trust the natural rhythm of healing. Nature is never in a hurry—and neither should you be.
Winds of Change: The Surge of Emotion
One day, the numbness gives way. And it’s not gentle. Rage. Confusion. The injustice of it all. The waves crash harder than before.
But remember: the boat you’re in was built to survive these storms.
How to weather this emotional storm:
-
Let these big emotions exist. You’re not broken for feeling them—you’re processing.
-
The fear isn’t in the feeling itself, but in believing you can’t handle the feeling. You can.
-
These emotional surges often carry hidden truths and insights—pay attention. When the storm quiets, they’ll help you chart a better path ahead.
Rainfall: Letting the Sadness Come
Raindrops on your cheeks. Not from the sky, but from within. Sadness seeps into your day, unannounced. Tears seem endless. Emotions overwhelming.
Most of us try to distract or suppress it. But we both know—that never really works.
Instead, try this:
“When we accept and embrace painful emotions, they don't overstay their welcome. They visit and then leave just as they came.”
– Tal Ben-Shahar
-
Emotions have a purpose. They help us find meaning in what we’ve experienced.
-
Allowing sadness to surface clears space for joy, gratitude, relief, and peace to return—when you’re ready.
Sea of Calm: A New Beginning
Then one day, without fanfare, you may notice: the waves are gentler. The sky a little clearer. The breeze… hopeful.
You wake up, and something inside you feels slightly more okay.
You might even say “hello” to Life again.
Navigating this new calm:
-
If you’ve lost someone: Reflect on how you’d like to honor their memory in your life.
-
If you're stepping into something new: Think about the old patterns you can leave behind, and the new ones that will serve you better.
This is your invitation to begin again—on your terms, with your truth.
A Love Note to You
My friend, my warrior
I know these storms feel rude and relentless.
But trust me—
These feelings carry lessons.
Lessons that will one day
Strengthen you.
Deepen your compassion.
Connect you to life in unimaginable ways.
March on, dear one.
You are not alone.
You never were.
You never will be.
The storms will pass.
And with them, the sky will clear.
The sun will rise again.
And with it—
A new you.
All emotions flow through the same pipeline. Numb one, and you numb them all.
If you or someone you know is navigating grief, loss, or sorrow, consider reaching out to our ‘Support’ and ‘Engage’ verticals for affordable and inclusive mental health care.
Like our content?
Please support us by sharing and upvoting 💛
Image Credits: Unsplash