Healing the Inner Child: A Journey Toward Wholeness

Our experiences as children tend to have a lingering impact in many of our lives.

As we carry within us the wisdom of our present selves, we also have parts of ourselves that remind us of this impact…

This influences the way we look at the present, engage in relationships, manage our mental and physical health, and set aspirations for life.

These often-unaddressed aspects of ourselves—unresolved parts of our experience, unmet and unfulfilled needs we felt growing up—show up in ways unexpected:

Insecurity, loneliness, anxiety, lack of confidence, issues with addictions, self-defeating patterns…

Our inner child symbolizes those wounded parts of us that need to be seen, heard, understood, unconditionally accepted, revered, and healed.

In this article, I hope to shed light on the importance of Inner Child Healing—the work within that can set us on a journey of understanding, nurturing, and celebrating all parts of ourselves. So we can shift the narrative from barely surviving and existing to one of thriving and truly living.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecies

Judgments passed on us repeatedly in childhood can settle deep within and eventually feel like truth:

You are not good enough. You are not smart enough. There’s no chance you’ll succeed. You’re so flawed, it’s shameful. Worst of all... you are not worthy of love.

We grow into adults who conform to these beliefs, unknowingly fulfilling these prophecies. Here’s how we begin to undo them:

Recognize long-held beliefs that have never been challenged simply because they came from “trustworthy” sources—authority figures, caregivers, or peers.
Begin to tune into who you really are, what your values are, and learn to trust your own voice—one you’ve had little time to hear while just trying to survive.
Acknowledge your struggles, your perseverance, your lonely victories. Give yourself credit for all the ways you've kept moving forward in the dark.
Befriend new, healthier beliefs and perspectives that align with your truth, not your trauma. Base your choices on these.

When the World Feels Dark and Daunting

Abuse at home. Bullies at school. Friends who turn their backs. Experiences that make you believe life is only brutal, painful, and hopeless—no matter what you do.

That you can never trust again.

But here’s the truth:

Deeply hurtful past experiences can cause extreme emotional reactions to present-day triggers—so overwhelming they convince us we’re broken or weak.
When distress becomes a constant, our focus shifts entirely inward, making it difficult to read or respond to others’ needs.
But as you begin to unpack the past, you slowly relearn the art of living: trusting, connecting, working, feeling joy, and loving again.

Self-Proclaimed Prison Sentences

The wounds of our past become chains we willingly keep on, punishing ourselves instead of nurturing. These wounds become reasons for self-sabotage.

Here’s how those “prison sentences” often show up:

Dismissing your own effort or achievements
Being hyper-critical over minor mistakes
Setting impossible standards you hold yourself to
Staying in unfulfilling or toxic relationships
Remaining in jobs or situations that stunt your growth
Refusing to dream, convinced you don’t deserve happiness or success

The Journey of Healing

Inner Child work is a deep process of self-exploration and reconnection. It’s the path to nurturing, validating, and celebrating the parts of you that needed it most—and still do.

This process involves:

Gently getting in touch with parts of yourself that seek expression—the ones triggered most often—and meeting them with compassion, not judgment
Offering yourself words of affirmation and comfort—the kind you may have longed for as a child
Embracing joy through small, meaningful rituals, fun treats, and safe, loving relationships that reinforce your worth and bring out your authentic self

A Loving Reminder

The children we once were still breathe and live within us.

When they reach out, crying or trembling or aching—listen.

Offer them your calm, loving presence.

Offer them kind words like:

I see you. I’m proud of you. You have been so brave.
I won’t abandon you. I care for you deeply.
It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling.
Your emotions are welcome here, always.
I will be here—as your mentor, friend, and guide.

Join the Journey

If you or somebody you know can benefit from Inner Child work, please join us for our Inner Child Workshop on Sunday, the 21st of July, 2024.

In the meantime, if you or someone you know is struggling with childhood trauma, consider reaching out to our ‘Support’ and ‘Engage’ verticals for affordable and inclusive help.    

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