Pain- an unpleasant sensory and emotional experience. Going through life without experiencing pain would be like flying pigs; impossible. Pain warrants corrective action. Imagine being hurt and not seeking help. Sounds unrealistic. Or does it…? 

 

Defining Pain 

The word ‘pain’ has been used to describe negative and intense feelings. Life throws a great deal of such painful experiences- breakups, failures, job losses, death of loved ones and what not. Scores of literature, poetry, songs, ghazals, paintings and various other art forms have been dedicated to such experiences. They provide people with cathartic experience that is invaluable.  

 

Yet, some shy away from sharing their experiences. Sharing feels no less than a crime. People might do so owing to various reasons. Some may fail to acknowledge their problem. Others may acknowledge but still think their trouble is not ‘that much’. Some may attribute it to their fate. While some may feel helpless and not know what to do next.  

 

Mental illness and pain 

Government data suggests that 11 out of 100 people have Mental Illness (MI). Women are twice as likely to have MI than men. MIs such depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders, schizophrenia cause a great deal of suffering. Still, many people chose to suffer in silence, ignoring the concern altogether. Avoidance seems like a brilliant hack, until it does not. Bottling up, the mind becomes more like a pressure chamber, destined to explode.  

 

Suffering in Silence 

Despite MIs being highly prevalent, many still don’t seek help. While there are many reasons, some of the commonly reported ones are- 

• Lack of awareness about MIs 
  Surprisingly, a large chunk of people are unaware about MIs. Many don’t know what constitutes as MIs. This prevents them from seeking help. 

• Poor access to Mental Health Professionals 
  Despite awareness, some still are unable to seek help. This is owing to scant number of professionals. For starters, there are only 3200 clinical psychologists in the country. Most of these professionals are restricted to metro cities. For those elsewhere, access is marred with difficulties.  

• Stigma associated with MI Beliefs like MIs are ‘incurable’ or require medication lifelong are common. These beliefs also prevent people from seeking help.  
• Fear of being judged  
  Sharing vulnerabilities and seeking help often is seen as being ‘weak’. Preoccupations with being judged takes the centre stage. In some places, people’s apprehensions may include them being segregated. Such overwhelming feelings also limit people from seeking help.  
• Societal influences  
  In some cultures, MIs are often thought of as wrath of God. Attributing it to some form of divine punishment is also common. Such influences also influence help seeking. More importantly, it determines who people seek help from- faith healers.  

 

Gender and tolerance 

The extent to which people suffer also gets influenced by their gender. Men are taught not to express, not to feel, and have it all figured out. Women's experiences are discarded, more often than not, by labelling them as ‘sensitive’ or just ‘emotional’. Either way, people lose touch with their emotions, their own reality. Rationalised thoughts like ‘this is what a man goes through’ or ‘this is my fate’ kick in. They may lower the distress but ultimately delay help seeking.   

 

Breaking free and seeking help 

It’s okay to seek help. Normalising help seeking for MI has been the sole mission for many of the mental health professionals. Reels, blogposts, newspaper articles, YouTube videos, come off as great tools for disseminating information.  Such attempts normalise help seeking by creating a more informed and accepting environment.  

 

However, the buck stops at the personal level. Acknowledging the need for help does not make anyone appear ‘weak’. Rather, it’s a show of strength, which must be appreciated. Leading a life full of suffering provides certainty in its own ways. Naturally, then the prospect of breaking free from pain may seem daunting at first. Therapy and counselling may feel like stepping into the unknown. At many times, one may feel clueless, not knowing what happens next. 

 

As it is, being uncertain is never easy. Who likes being uncertain anyways. Nevertheless, it is the fate of life that we’ll be uncertain at times. What becomes important is how we cope with uncertainty. Being equipped with the psychological know-how would be helpful. It empowers the person to possess higher agency.  

 

You are not Alone 

People however often feel lonely on their journey. They may feel as if they are beyond being understood. There is a desire to seek help. Naturally, there are also apprehensions. If this resonates with you, you aren’t alone. iDare offers comprehensive therapy packages with experts. Therapy with us is a safe and non-judgmental space. Our culturally sensitive therapists are ready to provide help. 

 

Help is accessible. So is a better life. 

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